I am honored to have my friend Shelby Thomas as a guest on the blog. Shelby is the mother of two sweet girls and her first pregnancy was a double surprise with two babies instead of one!
I asked her to share her story so we can see the unique challenges and joys that Mothers face through their pregnancy journeys. Shelby started a website and community to help other first time twin Moms on their journey.
She shares her must haves for new twin parents, a registry that you can download, and a space to share with other twin Moms. Check out Shelby’s website here https://twinbabyregistry.com/
Have you ever had a baby before? What about twins? Imagine being a first-time mom and finding out you’re pregnant with two! That’s the boat I was in just 3 short years ago.
Covid had literally just kicked off when my husband and I found out we were pregnant. I can remember going to the first ultrasound appointment together to find out if we were even pregnant at all…which I was pretty sure we were since I took three separate at-home pregnancy tests and every single one of them came back positive.
Those were still the good ol’ days. He was allowed into the appointment room with me, masks weren’t a thing yet, and social distancing was just something voluntary you did if you didn’t feel like leaving the house.
But back then it was just beginning. The ultrasound tech waved her magic wand and said, “Congratulations! You’re about to double the number of your family’s grandchildren!”
My husband’s sister already had two kids at the time, so some quick math told us that meant we were having two. I’m pretty sure I laughed out loud.
My husband was in disbelief, shock and probably having an “oh crap” moment sitting there next to me in that exam room, too. I thought, “Of course we’d be pregnant with twins. Why wouldn’t we be? We never do anything easy or simple. Why not have two babies at the same time!”
First Trimester
The next few weeks were a blur. I was trying to figure out what prenatal to take, what not to eat to avoid throwing up and what smells I had to avoid to also not throw up the food I was lucky to keep down.
There was about a 5-minute window between feeling like I was starving and not eating fast enough before that starvation turned into nausea. Therefore, I always carried crackers in my purse and had some in every room of the house in case the feeling hit me.
I also kept peppermints in my pockets so I could eat one if I started feeling queasy. I avoided fried food like the plague. Just catching a slight whiff in the direction of my normally beloved Chick fil A on a hot day sent me into a gagging fit. But give me literally all the fruit a grocery store could hold and an Oreo Cement Mixer from Culver’s, and this girl was on cloud 9.
The only major issue I ran into during the end of my first trimester, was my MFM doctor spreading a little bit of fear and paranoia every time I visited. Because I was having twins, that automatically meant I was a “high-risk” pregnancy, and in addition to seeing my regular OB for ultrasounds, I would also need to go to a Maternal Fetal Medicine doctor (MFM). I go more in detail on that whole ordeal, here.
Aside from that, the first trimester was easy for me. I didn’t start showing a bump until around 16 weeks. The real fun didn’t begin until my third trimester…
Second Trimester
The second trimester of my twin pregnancy was great, to be honest. I was living life at a pretty normal pace. Aside from Covid shutting everything down, my husband and I were still able to spend time together and took a road trip to the beach for a week for a “babymoon” vacation.
Now I was really appreciating the social distancing, because everywhere we went, they made you sit 6 feet away from the next group of people and that meant restaurants weren’t crowded, and we could finally hear each other talk during our meals. It also meant, not as many nosy people making random, weird pregnancy comments.
The only thing I didn’t like was the fact that my husband was never allowed to attend another ultrasound appointment with me for the rest of my pregnancy. He drove me to all my appointments, but instead of being allowed in, he waited patiently in the parking lot, and I FaceTimed him from the exam room. I was extremely grateful for him just being there for me. Even if he couldn’t sit next to me, I knew he would be waiting for me when I got done.
The second trimester was when I got all my nesting done. We painted and decorated the nursery. I did countless hours of research for what I would need to prepare for twins.
It was because of that intense preparation and my experience now after having had twins for 3 years, that allowed me to start TwinBabyRegistry.com and design a baby registry tailored for twin moms. Learn more about that, here.
I had my hospital bag packed by week 28 and was ready to go! I knew that twin pregnancies commonly end earlier than singletons, so I wanted to be prepared for anything to happen. We had their car seats and double stroller ready, the nursing pillows, the bottles, the pumps, and countless other supplies necessary for twin life.
Third Trimester
When I said the real fun began in my third trimester, I meant it. I had been feeling good. I thought maybe I was getting lucky. I was just sailing through my second trimester, and it would be like that until the end.
Until one day, I woke up and…”Hello, cankles! Where did you come from?” I’m talking about no leg definition whatsoever. My thighs started at the top of my legs and continued right on down to the floor. I no longer had knees or ankles, and I couldn’t even see my toes if I tried.
Compression socks became a staple part of my wardrobe, even in the 100-degree Texas summer heat.
If I left the house, it was in sandals a size bigger than normal, a long maxi dress to cover up my legs, and wireless compression devices that I could wear on my legs in the car so I could still walk when I got to my destination.
I also installed a strap around the seat of my car that had a hook on it to hold the lap belt of the seatbelt away from my stomach. The device kept the lap belt in between my legs, instead.
This device was supposed to protect my stomach and babies in the case of an accident. But what I truly appreciated it for, was protecting my bladder from getting squeezed by the seat belt to prevent an accident.
By the 34-week mark, I was a blimp. I was rolling myself over to get out of bed. My birthday was coming up and I didn’t feel much like celebrating. It was mid-August, hot, and I was miserable.
Preparing for Delivery
My OB said that I should have a steroid shot just in case the babies decided to come early, that way their lungs would be better prepared. I think maybe she noticed something at that week’s appointment to suggest that I go and get the shots.
I think I was having Braxton Hicks contractions at that point, also. Luckily, our hospital allowed my husband to come with me for the shots (still during peak Covid) and so we did that on a Friday. By Monday, my water broke at 10pm and we were heading back to the hospital.
I should mention that the tiny Braxton Hicks contractions I was having did not hurt at all. They were barely noticeable. Just a small tightening in my abdomen. And when my water broke, I wasn’t even sure that’s what had happened.
I called the off-hours OB line for my doctor and explained everything. That nurse advised me to go to the hospital. So, don’t feel embarrassed to call and ask someone for help or to walk you through what you’re experiencing.
If this is your first baby or babies, how would you know?
At the hospital, a nurse brought me a wheelchair and wheeled me to the window to check in. At this point, we were just going to get examined and see if we needed to stay there to have the babies, or if it was a false alarm.
They took us to an exam room where we waited to get me checked out. Apparently, I was having contractions. I say it that way because I never had any pain. I knew that something was happening because I could slightly feel them, but they were no more evident than the Braxton Hicks. And they were about six minutes apart, the last count I can remember.
I had to stay hooked up to a bunch of monitor machines with the tapes on my belly, which they let me wheel around the room on a mobile stand so I could go back and forth to the bathroom and pee a million times an hour.
I think they expected me to get some sleep that night as we waited for 7:30am to come around, which is when I would be prepped for a c-section. But I didn’t sleep a wink.
C-Section Prep
When the morning came, I was wheeled to the delivery room where I would be attended by two doctors (one of which was my OB) seven nurses, and my husband who got to come into the room with me and watch.
He stood right by my side the entire time and since he is tall, he got a good view of the action over the sheet. I opted for an epidural even though my original plan was to have the babies naturally, no c-section, no nothing. But the plans changed, and we had to adapt for the safety of the babies.
To receive the epidural, you’re expected to balance your big pregnant self, sitting on top of a skinny operating table. They warn you before you receive the shot (with a needle that looks way too long to be going anywhere) that it may cause you to be nauseous, but that there would be a little barf bag for me should I need it.
Y’all…it wasn’t 10 minutes later, and I was needing that bag. So be ready. At that point I was already laying down on that skinny table praying I didn’t fall off while leaning over the side to vomit. At this point, my husband was ushered into the room and the delivery began.
What is a C-Section Like?
They start by making the incision down below your stomach. After they open you up, you can literally feel exactly where they are and what they’re doing. It doesn’t hurt because you’re hopefully numb at this point from the epidural, but you’ll know where their hands are and what is going on.
Everyone always says, “It feels like tugging.” I would kind of agree. But, no one ever tells you that you can feel their hands and them moving things around to maneuver the babies out. I was telling my husband exactly where they were as it was happening.
I knew when they were taking Baby A out and when they were getting Baby B. It feels like a giant weight being lifted off your body/chest (because, well, it is) and you’re able to breathe better immediately.
The nurses brought each baby past me, and I was able to touch their faces for one quick second while my husband snapped a picture. Then they were whisked away to the NICU. Then came the crazy part. Not for them, but for me.
Delivery Complications
After they stitched up my incision, they wheeled me in my bed to the recovery room. Then, I started shaking. Like a violent shiver, but one that I couldn’t get warm from. My shoulders and neck were so tense. I wanted it to stop.
I remember telling my husband to squeeze my shoulders and give me a massage so that I wouldn’t be tense anymore. I felt like that was partly triggering my shivering and making it worse. As he squeezed and massaged my neck/shoulders it helped tremendously.
But then there was a flood of nurses and doctors in the room in a panic working on me. My bed sheet was flipped up and there were things going on down there so fast I didn’t even know what was happening.
Apparently, I was hemorrhaging and rapidly losing a lot of blood. My doctor, praise God, was able to stop it somehow. My husband continued to massage my neck until the shivering finally subsided. It was for this reason that I was bedridden for the next 48 hours.
C-Section Recovery Period
My babies were on the opposite side of the hospital from my post-delivery recovery room. I didn’t see them until the next day when I was wheeled down there in my hospital bed because I didn’t even have the strength to get into a wheelchair. I didn’t get to hold them then either.
I laid in my bed and looked on at them in their little “space shuttles” from the doorway of their individual NICU rooms. This part was sad to me. But my husband got to visit them and get pictures to bring back and show me. So, I was grateful for that.
I received two pints of blood to make up for what I had lost. After the blood, some rest, and a surprisingly great hospital meal, I was feeling better. I was finally able to get into a wheelchair and go hold my babies.
Here is where I want to say — everyone’s delivery experience is different. I made the mistake of imagining myself getting to hold my babies after delivery or at the very least being able to go see them in the NICU right away after it was over with.
That would have been the normal expectation, I think. But when that didn’t happen, I had to keep my chin up and be thankful that I was still there to see them at all.
I saw other moms waltzing across the postpartum recovery floor to and from the refreshment room like their c-sections were nothing at all. And even by the evening of the third day, the most I could muster was a turtle-paced granny walk, holding onto my husband’s arm to steady myself.
My best advice after having gone through it, is not to be too set in your expectations or visions of the perfect delivery experience. Instead, pray for a healthy mama and babies and be ready to adapt to whatever happens next.
Postpartum Recovery with Twins
The recovery period took a long time for me, even after I went home from the hospital. The doctor cleared me at 6 weeks to start gradually working out and doing normal activities again. But, at 6 weeks I was not feeling like doing any of that yet. So, trust your body and don’t rush it.
I waited until month 3 to start to even think about exercise because I honestly just didn’t have any energy prior to that point. Taking care of two really knocks it out of you.
But, whenever I finally did do some workouts, I was doing super low-impact, barre-like workouts for only 10 minutes at a time.
Why 10 minutes you ask?
Because as a mom of twins, (or mom in general) that is literally all I had time for between breastfeedings, pumping, diaper changing and rocking babies.
Which brings me to why I love Lydia’s postpartum workouts so much. She’s a mom who actually gets it. She understands the toll a pregnancy can take on your body and your mental health. And she also understands the proper exercises to do in order to meet you where you’re at in your recovery journey.
Having a 10 minute workout is better than a zero minute workout.
So, if you’re hoping to bounce back to that pre-baby body in two weeks, that might not be realistic unless you were blessed with great genetics. But don’t be discouraged. Give yourself grace. Your body just grew two humans and delivered them into this world! You are beautiful, mama.
If you need twin pregnancy support, or help planning for what you need for twins, please check out TwinBabyRegistry.com and sign up to create a free baby registry tailored for twins. And if you’d like to join the Twin Mom Support Community, all of Lydia’s fans get a free trial by clicking here.
Happy Twin Pregnancy Planning!
Shelby
Founder of Twin Baby Registry